June 5, 2012
Which brings me to my first review for Reckless Video: John Carter. John Carter got mixed reviews
from critics, did not do well at the box office, but DID set box office records in Russia. So there's that. I
had heard two things about this movie: 1) that Tim Riggins was in it, and 2) that is was awful. Only the
first one turned out to be true.
John Carter was directed by Andrew Stanton, who directed animated classics like Finding Nemo and Wall-E. It's based on stories written 100 years ago by Edgar Rice Burroughs, whose name is used for one of the first characters we meet in the movie. I'd call it an homage except that the character named after him is a bit of a ninny. Sorry, Edgar. Dead men can't complain.
The movie stars Taylor Kitsch, AKA my little Tim Riggins from Friday Night Lights (also available at Reckless - FNL is one of those shows where you need to be prepared to be sucked into a long-term commitment after watching the first episode. It's that good.) For those of you unfamiliar with Taylor Kitsch, think "this generation's Jordan Catalano (My So Called Life)." Got it? Good. Let's move on.
John Carter is a Civil War Captain looking for beans (this is true, go with it) when he is transported to the planet Barsoom, or, MARS. I never really understood why we are calling it Barsoom. Neither does Carter. The people there are like, "You're on Barsoom" and he's like "oh you mean Mars?" and they're like "yeah I guess". I don't get it. But John ends up on Barsoom, losing most of his clothes in the process (this is a key plot point), and gets unwillingly dragged into a fight between the people of Zodanga and those from Helium.
Helium. Like the element. Which kept making me giggle when people were being urged to "fight for helium!" Although it's better than "fight for Thulium" which just makes everyone sound like they have a cold.
So John fights this war with the Tharks (whole other breed of animal) using his super power.......which is jumping. JUMPING, people. No one in the history of "what would your super hero power be" has EVER picked "jumping." But that's John's thing - he jumps super high and it just blows everyone's mind. On this planet, where everything has four arms and ships have wings with scales on them, they're out of their minds for John Carter's jumping. Dude, don't even show them a card trick. You'll be made into a god.
Now, here's the thing that surprised me - I liked this movie! In the first hour, there were parts that made me laugh out loud. It was being intentionally silly and really fun. When we got deeper into the war and the battle scenes, it dragged a bit for me. But the special effects really are fantastic and there are some great characters. And John Carter asks to be buried in a tomb that can only be opened from the inside. That, my friends, is the kind of crazy anybody can get behind.
Meredith reviews John Carter
I love movies. I love good movies, and I love maybe-missed-the-mark-in-the-quest-for-goodness movies. Sometimes you want to watch something that makes you think, and makes you feel. And sometimes you just want to watch a movie that Roger Ebert, when he asked himself in his review if it got the job done, answered with a rousing, "I suppose." Many of my favorite movie watching experiences have been with the zero to two star movies.Which brings me to my first review for Reckless Video: John Carter. John Carter got mixed reviews
from critics, did not do well at the box office, but DID set box office records in Russia. So there's that. I
had heard two things about this movie: 1) that Tim Riggins was in it, and 2) that is was awful. Only the
first one turned out to be true.John Carter was directed by Andrew Stanton, who directed animated classics like Finding Nemo and Wall-E. It's based on stories written 100 years ago by Edgar Rice Burroughs, whose name is used for one of the first characters we meet in the movie. I'd call it an homage except that the character named after him is a bit of a ninny. Sorry, Edgar. Dead men can't complain.
The movie stars Taylor Kitsch, AKA my little Tim Riggins from Friday Night Lights (also available at Reckless - FNL is one of those shows where you need to be prepared to be sucked into a long-term commitment after watching the first episode. It's that good.) For those of you unfamiliar with Taylor Kitsch, think "this generation's Jordan Catalano (My So Called Life)." Got it? Good. Let's move on.
John Carter is a Civil War Captain looking for beans (this is true, go with it) when he is transported to the planet Barsoom, or, MARS. I never really understood why we are calling it Barsoom. Neither does Carter. The people there are like, "You're on Barsoom" and he's like "oh you mean Mars?" and they're like "yeah I guess". I don't get it. But John ends up on Barsoom, losing most of his clothes in the process (this is a key plot point), and gets unwillingly dragged into a fight between the people of Zodanga and those from Helium.
Helium. Like the element. Which kept making me giggle when people were being urged to "fight for helium!" Although it's better than "fight for Thulium" which just makes everyone sound like they have a cold.
So John fights this war with the Tharks (whole other breed of animal) using his super power.......which is jumping. JUMPING, people. No one in the history of "what would your super hero power be" has EVER picked "jumping." But that's John's thing - he jumps super high and it just blows everyone's mind. On this planet, where everything has four arms and ships have wings with scales on them, they're out of their minds for John Carter's jumping. Dude, don't even show them a card trick. You'll be made into a god.
Now, here's the thing that surprised me - I liked this movie! In the first hour, there were parts that made me laugh out loud. It was being intentionally silly and really fun. When we got deeper into the war and the battle scenes, it dragged a bit for me. But the special effects really are fantastic and there are some great characters. And John Carter asks to be buried in a tomb that can only be opened from the inside. That, my friends, is the kind of crazy anybody can get behind.
Meredith Bland is a
freelance writer who blogs
at www.pileofbabies.com